Eat at Your Own Risk

I have been learning a ton about myself while on this UltraMind diet with Kevin. I did not expect to discover so much, actually. For one, this dieting thing is way more difficult than I anticipated. It not only takes much money, time, and creativity (only one of which I actually have in abundance), but an incredible amount of will power. Also, while I may be a disciplined person, I never noticed just how emotionally and psychologically attached to foods that I am. During such a stressful week as this one, just a few lapses of judgment into a bowl of Ramen Noodles and a bag of Doritos and I am normally okey-dokey again. Plus--and this was more suprising for me--I really have this whole elaborate coping-mechanism system which involves lots of starchy carbs, full fats, and dairy products, as well as reading and reading and reading, and either becoming agoraphobic or going out to shop. Since I do this sort of slowly and only allow small changes at a time, I hardly notice that suddenly I have changed the evening's plans from a play date to dinner in: cheesy potatoes or mac 'n' cheese; have two breads baking at one time; and have completely devoured about 5 vegan brownies and 1/2 of the Anne of Green Gables series. Something else really surprising: it is really hard for even me--the self-professed sugar-shunner--to go without sugar constantly and for a prolonged period. Last thing of note: Kev can survive on a low-fat diet. I can not. I think I am sort of wasting away and would probably maim you if you dangled bacon in front of me.

But I am still on the diet, I think mostly b/c Kevin is not only really sticking to it, but he is thriving. Less than four weeks to go!

Here is the bread that I created in pure desperation. (We can't have wheat or gluten or dairy or any sugar (even honey, maple, agave, stevia...), so bread is pretty much all the way out. I never knew I needed bread like this.)

Devon's UltraMind Corn Bread

1 cup corn meal
1 cup brown rice flour
2 T organic red grape juice
2 t baking powder
1/3 t sea salt
1 cup unsweetened soy milk (and gluten free)
1/4 cup olive oil (or coconut or a nut oil, depending on how you are to serve it)
1 egg

-Preheat oven to 425F.
-Oil a shallow loaf pan.
-Mix together wet and dry ingredients, separate.
-Mix liquid into dry and combine, but do not over-mix.
-Bake for 15-20 minutes, until golden and knife comes out clean. Under-baking results in disaster.
-Serve with a dab of all-fruit, fresh berries, or chili (which is how we ate it).

Now, if you are not on a restrictive diet, perhaps this bread will not taste awesome. But Kevin and I consumed ours by the rudely-full mouth-full and standing over the kitchen counter.

We've learned much about eating habits, what we can accomplish, and what we want to avoid in the future--Kevin off sugar is a beautiful thing; eating out is really over-rated--but it will be really nice to re-introduce dairy and whole wheat and also to return to so many of the recipes (however doctored for health they become) that make me feel connected to my past and human... or humane. (I get really grumpy when no food or bad food is involved.) I am actually spending almost every squeezed-in free moment poring over all my favorite cookbooks and making lists upon lists of recipes that I want to try. I left the library with no less that 15 giant cookbooks heaped up to my nose, last Friday. They are picked apart, post-it-ed and ready to be copied, now. This is relaxing for me (as it always is when I am with gastronomy), and also torturous. I am sick of the UltraMind menu and am ready to try my hand at incorporating the Mind into My Menu.

We are persevering. But don't try this at home. Or do, I'm not sure which.

Good and night and good riddance.